How
To Annoy The IRS (Without Getting In Trouble!)
1.
Always put extra paper clips on your forms. Any foreign fasteners
or the like have to be removed and put away. 2.
Always put staples in the right hand corner. Go ahead and put
them down the whole
right side. The extractors who remove the mail
from the envelopes have to take out any staples on the right
side. 3.
If you send two checks, they'll have to staple your unsightly
envelope to your half destroyed form. 4.
If you're very unfortunate and have to pay taxes, send two or
three party check. On top
of paying with a third party check,
pay
one of the dollars you owe in cash. When an extractor receives
cash, no matter how small an amount, he has to take it to
a special desk
and fill out of few nasty forms. 5.
Line the bottom of your envelope with Elmer's glue and let it
dry before you put in you
forms, so that the automated
opener
doesn't
open it and the extractor has to open it by hand. 6.
Never arrange paperwork in the right order, or even facing the
right
way. Put a few upside down and backwards.
That
way they have
to remove all your staples, rearrange your paperwork
and re-staple it (on the left side). 7.
Sign your name in ink on every page. Any signature has to be
verified and then date
stamped. These are just
a
few of
the fun
and exciting
things you can do with the IRS. These methods are ONLY
recommended when you OWE money. 8.
When you mail it, mail it in a big envelope (even if its just
a single EZ form).
Big envelopes have to
be torn
and
sorted differently
than regular business size ones. An added bonus to
the big envelope is that they take priority over
other mail,
so the
workers can
hurry up and deal with your mess. 9.
Write a little letter of appreciation. Any letter received has
to be read and
stamped regardless of
what it is or
what it's on. 10.
Write your letter on something misshapen and unconventional.
Like on the back of a supermarket
sack. 11.
If they owe you money, being nice helps.
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